Two days ago, my husband and I moved our daughters into their college dorms. One is a junior and the one is a freshman. The topic of adult conversation around this moment in our lives has been about our readiness for an empty nest. When I respond that I am eager for the change, I am met with doubt and comments about how much I am going to miss the girls.
I reasserted that I would not miss them as much as I looked forward to seeing them again and experiencing how they are changing as humans. I would not miss them as much as I looked forward to seeing how they were figuring out how to be in relationships with each other as maturing adult sisters and maturing adults with parents like us.
I spent the night with a college friend the night after we moved the girls into their college dorms. The next morning, she made breakfast and offered me a cup of tea, which I initially declined. We have known each other for quite some time and she responded to my rejection of tea by saying “I’m making you tea anyway.” The only reason I declined was because I prefer real tea – no bags, no Lipton (unless I’m making gallons of iced-tea). On the morn of depositing my offspring onto a college campus, real tea was in order!
I reasserted that I would not miss them as much as I looked forward to seeing them again and experiencing how they are changing as humans. I would not miss them as much as I looked forward to seeing how they were figuring out how to be in relationships with each other as maturing adult sisters and maturing adults with parents like us.
I spent the night with a college friend the night after we moved the girls into their college dorms. The next morning, she made breakfast and offered me a cup of tea, which I initially declined. We have known each other for quite some time and she responded to my rejection of tea by saying “I’m making you tea anyway.” The only reason I declined was because I prefer real tea – no bags, no Lipton (unless I’m making gallons of iced-tea). On the morn of depositing my offspring onto a college campus, real tea was in order!
Kate “the great” – as she affectionately referred to herself in college, made me a cup of Chai from scratch – no bags or powders, and we joked about how Lipton was for iced-tea and those who knew no better. I drank a cup with breakfast then poured the rest into my Teavana insulated container, hugged her two sons, and said my good-byes, as Kate promised to buy our Michael Franks concert tickets that very day. I left her house with a hot mug-o-Chai and containers with ingredients to make more of it when I got home.
Wil and I got home about 11pm. I brought my overnight bag and mug-o-Chai into the house. I opened the Teavana container to pour the Chai out and noticed it had thickened and become a bit curdled. Its consistency was different from processed Chai I was used to getting on the go from quick stop coffee places and restaurants. This Chai was not processed. Its recipe was fresh. It was meant to be appreciated, savored, and enjoyed not kept in a container all day.
This morn, I took the ingredients I got from Kate the great and brewed a giant cup of Chai. I took that giant cup-o-Chai (along with two peanut-butter-Nutella covered croissants) to my deck, where I appreciated, savored, and enjoyed it because I knew it was not made to last all day.
In those Chai moments, I understood why I did not miss my children, who are now doing something on their college campus. In my heart, I am happy to feel parenting was (and continues to be) a cup of freshly brewed Chai - meant to be an appreciated, savored, and enjoyed experience.
Wil and I got home about 11pm. I brought my overnight bag and mug-o-Chai into the house. I opened the Teavana container to pour the Chai out and noticed it had thickened and become a bit curdled. Its consistency was different from processed Chai I was used to getting on the go from quick stop coffee places and restaurants. This Chai was not processed. Its recipe was fresh. It was meant to be appreciated, savored, and enjoyed not kept in a container all day.
This morn, I took the ingredients I got from Kate the great and brewed a giant cup of Chai. I took that giant cup-o-Chai (along with two peanut-butter-Nutella covered croissants) to my deck, where I appreciated, savored, and enjoyed it because I knew it was not made to last all day.
In those Chai moments, I understood why I did not miss my children, who are now doing something on their college campus. In my heart, I am happy to feel parenting was (and continues to be) a cup of freshly brewed Chai - meant to be an appreciated, savored, and enjoyed experience.